Nappy Little Thing

I just spent the evening with my new boyfriend Napster. He sat on my lap and downloaded on me for hours. It was seriously fun, but I do have a sore neck. And after a full four hours of going at it, I think I am a convert. Even if he makes me pay for it. My inner DJ has awoken. And I specialize in non-sequitur CD compilations. One random hit after another with no mercy and no regard for continuity. True, I am a good seven years behind the times, but having just gotten my first cell phone in September marks me as a person who is too out of it to even get how out of it she is. What I am saying is: I already know I am a dork. Don't try to enlighten me. Just read my just-started list of hits that you should seriously think about downloading.

First, let me say that while I do have eclectic taste and a Bionic Woman-esque ear for music, this initial journey of the ear was all about nostalgia. So, don't get your panties in a wad because I mention tunes you thought a smarty like me might be above. I'm not. Just because I like classical Indian music, old time, Latin and indie rock doesn't mean I can't appreciate the occasional Christina Aguilera ditty. (How can you not sing along with Genie in a Bottle?) Having gotten the disclaimer out of the way, proceed to your seat. The show is about to start.

They say you never forget your first download and I am no exception to that rule. Can I suggest with any more vehemence that you check out that hauntingly, yearning song by The Church: Under the Milky Way? No, I cannot. My second, I do actually forget. So, just check these out:

Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five: White Lines
The Clash: Lost in the Supermarket, Train in Vain and Radio Clash
(Actually, almost anything by The Clash works, as does anything from the soundtrack to Hedwig and the Angry Inch.)
Adam Ant: Desperate but not Serious
Marvin Gaye: Inner City Blues
Pete Townshend: Let my Love Open the Door
Joe Jackson: Steppin' Out
B-52's: Rock Lobster
Simple Minds: Promised You a Miracle
Temptations: Can't Get Next to You
Chaka Khan and Rufus: Ain't Nobody
Neil Diamond: Cherry, Cherry
E.L.O: Mr. Blue Sky
Eddie Kendricks: Keep On Truckin'

Well, I could go on, but then I'd be acting as musically self-absorbed as all of my musician ex-boyfriends, none of whom are on this list. For that, try Craig's List under the musician ads: "Seriously talented but delusional Peter Pan seeks shiftless egomaniacs to "jam" endlessly, not get gigs and fantasize for three to five years while cultivating uninspired songs that hopefully lead to threesomes with barely legal back-up singers. Substance abuse a plus....."

Bringing ourselves back to the happy place, I will end by revealing the song that earned my unswerving appreciation for my new buddy Napster. It's true. It's the ABBA song S.O.S. I even played it twice since I can do that for free three times til it officially becomes a crime! And if you are one of those song stealers, don't include me on your list of people to share files with. I am already legally committed to another matter. See post# 5007: Work Comp: Employee Protection or the Circle of Hell Dante Forgot to Write About?